I told you that I was bad at math.
Earlier this week, I overanalyzed my favorite episode of Seinfeld and tried to understand how a runner that arrived 50 minutes late could possibly lead the NYC Marathon at mile 24. Thanks to a couple of friends, I realized there were some major flaws in my original post.
I Was Wrong About the Start Time of the Professional Mens’ Race
If we assume that Jean Paul arrived as Wave 1 began its race, this would have only put him a few minutes behind the elite field. This would still have made it virtually impossible for him to be leading at Central Park, but it wouldn’t have given the rest of the pack the 50 minute head start that made me belly laugh as I wrote my original post.
But even with that flaw in my original equation, I was reminded of some plot holes. And yes, I know I’m getting really deep down this rabbit hole about a television show, but I’m having a lot of fun and you can’t tell me what to do with my time.
Jean Paul’s Accommodations Were Nowhere Near the Starting Line
Before relocating them to his apartment, Jerry insists that Jean Paul should stay at a hotel close to the starting line. We then see an exterior shot of the Bedford Hotel, which is now closed.
A quick Google Maps search for the Bedford Hotel takes us to 110 East 40th Street. Since the race begins in STATEN ISLAND, it’s easy to see that this is nowhere close to the starting line.
To make matters worse, Jerry takes Jean Paul back to his apartment because he doesn’t trust the Wake Up Call Guy. According to this Walking Tour of Seinfeld, Jerry’s apartment is on West 81st Street. Sure, it’s not absurd to think that Jerry managed to drive from the Upper West Side to Staten Island in just under an hour on THE MORNING OF THE MARATHON.
But still, I’m going to play the role of the skeptic.
Did Jerry and Jean Paul Pull a Rosie Ruiz?
In 1979, Rosie Ruiz finished the New York City Marathon in 11th place with a time just under 2 hours and 57 minutes. That is, until a freelance photographer reported seeing her on the subway during the race. She was of course disqualified, especially after pulling the same shenanigans to win the 1980 Boston Marathon.
My question now is simple: Did Jean Paul actually jump into the race somewhere in Manhattan?
At the 4:06 mark of this video, Jerry and Jean Paul fight their way onto the course through a huge crowd of people. After pleading their case, the race official more or less says, “Meh, whatever,” before letting Jean Paul begin his race.
The problem? Even if Jerry had managed to make it from West 81st to Staten Island in under an hour, spectators aren’t allowed at the foot of the Verrazano Bridge. I wasn’t 100% sure if this was the case in 1995, but in the video below, the only people on either side of the course look to be race officials and/or photographers.
So with this new information, I think it’s more plausible that Jean Paul and Jerry got as far as the foot of the Queensboro Bridge on the Manhattan side, where they pleaded (and eventually made) their case. And I bet that even an exasperated Jean Paul would have the fitness to run 11 miles in under 45 minutes, which would potentially explain how he was “leading” in Central Park.
The problem? If I’m right, a real-life Jean Paul would have been disqualified. Today, he’d be referenced constantly on the Marathon Investigation blog. “Pulling a Jean Paul” would be a phrase with serious strings attached. And the worldwide reaction to Jean Paul dousing himself with hot tea? Probably something along the lines of, “Eh, that’s what cheaters get!”
Did I miss anything else? Let me know in the comments section below!
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